Hey guys, It’s been a while since I’ve blogged and alot has been going on. I dont know but I havent really been feeling the need to acutally get on my laptop, except for when I’m logged onto Facebook or doing a Multi-Media design. Work has been draining me, I’m back to working nights and it’s starting to take a toll on my body. I guess because I’m used to mornings and then getting off work and doing whatever I want but that is not the case. But regardless, I love work and having money in my pocket that I’ve earned on my own……. no better feeling then that.
Me and my boyfriend been together for 3 months now. I’m liking the relationships because we went through our ups and down in the begn. I think us having that happened only made our relationship stronger and wiser and gave us a better understanding of each other. I cant stand being apart from him now, I try to spend more time with him as much as I can because before our schedules was totally different. He acutally has a promotional/club/party event company that I’m helping out with and it also gives us time to spend time together on the business side.
I thought doing that was going to be a bigger challenge because I cant be with him like I like because I have to understand when he’s at these events he’s this business person lol. Of course he makes me feel special but making lil shouts on the mic… which I think are cute but at the same time I hate. Other then that my life is going great.
I dont think I’m made for a relationship, well atleast at this point in my life. I feel as though, I’m young I want to explore my options and just be able to do me. The type of relationship the person im with is looking for is that serious – i want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you! I just dont feel like I I want that at this point. Instead of him always bashing me, I feel he should be happy I’m telling him – then just going out to cheat and mess around on him behind his back. I think it has to do with our ages because he’s 3 year’s older then me – he experienced alot more then I have like you had your fun let me have mines. Let me be able to make the mistakes on my own – if I make any, let me be able to go out and hang with friends with out you crying in my ear just let me “enjoy life”.
I’ve been hurt so many times – and when you hurt you dont want to experience something like that again. I know i have a good man by my side, but whats the point of being with someone if your not happy?
A short preview of Monica’s brand new video for “Everything To Me” which will appear on her forthcoming album Still Standing due in stores on March 23rd.
I dont even want to celebrate valentines day this year. My boy friend has been pissing me off these past couple weeks, I feel like I just cant take it no more. He’s jealous because me and my old male best friend became back cool, which he has a female best friend. He said “oh me and her have never been intimate“! I’m like whats that suppose to me. Whatever happened in the past “before I was with you” happened. I am not the type of female that goes around judging people for their past. Because trust…. there is alot I can judge him on, but I dont. I do not say anything when he tells me he going out to the club then after wards I find out he went with her! Both times he went to the club with this chick – whom I do not know – I did not find out until after wards. They took pictures and everything, and other shit. I can take a man being a real man, but I can not take a man being childish and always down my back. There should be a limit on how much bull shit you have to deal with in a relationship. I have never stressed out so much in my life , as I did in the past two weeks. I’m not even celebrating valentines day, I told him we’re going to have to post pone it. He coming with this “I’m jealous” text messages I can not take it. This is why I was single, people are so goody good when your not with them but as soon as you get with them BAM, things start changing. They turn into this whole different person.
Other things has been going great in my life – My first nephew died in 06′ , and I am happy to say my strong beautiful black sister gave birth Natural to a health baby boy the other day. I remember like it was yesterday that my niece was born – she’s 1 about to be 2 – they look just alike. I just hope he do not turn out bad like she is – but she’s just spoiled and he’s only a couple days old and I can tell he’s going to be spoiled also. Other then that things are good. I hope everyone have a nice valentine’s day and stuff. Until next time Much love!
Looking back at the past 10 years, I can say I have made alot of lesson learned (regretted) situations and been through alot. I can not be like most people and say “it’s a new year a new me“, because really everyone is still going to be the same person they was yesterday. Words speak – but actions speak louder. This year, I am going to try to branch out my business opportunities and try working with some high powered people in my city. Already, my actions been speaking louder then my words because I’ve been doing some networking. I am just trying to archive my goals this year – rather then just making a list and pen pointing what I want to do. I am one of those type of women – who when I say I am going to do something – I am going to do it. My life has been moving in a great way – I’ve got in a relationship with a great man. He’s a Marine, and he’s one of those type of man who buys me flower, loves to cook food for me, and just treat me right. At first, I admit I was kind of skeptical because he was very different from most men I’ve dated and been attracted to. Sometimes in order to feel good and not get hurt you must step out side of the box – to look at the bigger picture. I had to ask myself would I rather want to be treat right?, or would I want to date the kind of men I’m used to and get hurt all over again. I chose what my heart told me to do and when he asked for me to be apart of his life – it felt like he was asking me to marry him. It was sweet and romantic. He’s the type of man who dont judge me based off of anything I tell him and it’s the same way with me. We both have our ugly pasts in our life, and we both cant help what happened before we met each other and what happened before we got together.
Work, has been going good..could be better. I’m really focused on going back to school, and becoming an RN! I feel like the point in my life right now, its just the beginning. I need to have an back up plan just in case the music business job does not fall through like I want it to. I have so many goals that I would like to archive within the next year it is crazy. I sat down and wrote out my 1, 5, and 10 year goals and the steps I need to take to make them reality. I felt so good because if you are organized in your life so that way you know which direction you want to take your life in.
Welcome to Crsfd.net. This is my personal space on the web where I
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ABOUT TOYA NICOLE
My name is Toya N. I am a 21 year old woman
currently living in Ohio. My passions are graphic design,
web design, writing stories and songs, multi-media promotions, listening
to music, watching basketball and football games and more. I'm a very big
on music - I run the official fansite for rapper Soulja Boy!
